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Friday, March 6, 2009

Differences ....

I've had many discussions over the years about what works in relationships and what doesn't - of course as expected there are numerous theories and lots of opposing views - from you need to have the same interests - to opposites attract.

Well I guess ultimately whether either of those extreme options work depends on the individuals. If the people both enjoy extending themselves, enjoy challenges, are eager to learn, enjoy new experiences and find that a necessary thing in order to ensure the relationship doesn't get boring or stale then obviously they are going to support that theory.

Or if you are happy for each other to have independent interests and different thoughts on subjects without feeling that is going to threaten your relationship then that's going to be the winning formula - accepting each other unconditionally.

However, if you're the kind of person that enjoys what you know - and have no desire to try new things - that what you know, gives you security that you crave and having someone that thinks the same and does the same things is what you want because you don't have to feel challenged - or potentially risk conflict - then obviously that's the theory you will support.

Of course if you are one extreme and your partner is the other extreme then you will find it hard to meet a common ground and that's when conflict will arise.

So I don't think it's necessarily that a certain formula is the one that works - it obviously depends on the people involved.

I would be one of the most non sporty, athletic people you could ever meet (although my teenage boyfriend begs to differ on this - apparently he thought I was quite sporty back then) I've never been interested in watching sport - or really playing it - exercise bores me.

The largest irony - today I walked my first round of gold just watching - even doing a bit of caddying - Despite living on a golf course for the first 16 years of my life - I have never ever watched a game.

I couldn't resist texting my very good friend to tell her - she said - OMG I don't even know you anymore! lol This in light of the fact in the last month I've also attended 3 touch rugby games, watched some one day cricket and rugby 7's (ok I have to confess to having to ask someone just now what that funny game was called!)

Anyway - I can't say that today's golf game was the most exciting 2 hours of my life - but I loved seeing what invokes passion in people - getting an insight and an understanding into what someone else loves.

I will never be a sportsman - or go out of my way to see the games - it doesn't ignite my inner fire - however I love learning new things - and I love being stimulated and having my horizons broadened. Amazing though how your interest can be sparked when you meet someone that is so passionately involved with something you're not. I have to admit that I felt that I was perhaps getting a bit on dimensional with all the art art art and more art in my life. Now its nice to be able to have a conversation with a non art person that is about something they are interested in.

and of course - imagine how that person feels to know that you care about them enough to take the time to listen - to learn - to really understand everything about them .....

Love makes us open our eyes - makes us want to learn - makes us want to be better people - makes us want to do something for others that we may never have done before ... what an amazing emotion love is ...

Tolerance and celebration of individual differences is the fire that fuels lasting love - Tom Hannah

Three keys to more abundant living: caring about others, daring for others, sharing with others. - William A. Ward

1 comment:

Philippine Golf Real State said...

I simply like you idea I gotta say golf is really fun and interesting game..